Loser

Today, it was like I was back in high school. I wonder if Kevin felt it. First, I made a little kid cry. I'm serious. I felt awful. We were playing "Fishy fishy," I tagged the kid, and he fell. Immediately started crying. First, shock. Then panic. Then horribleness. Then afterwards, after he calmed down a bit, I went over to him to formally apologize. He blamed the whole thing on me. That kind of pissed me off but I let it go. He's just a little kid after all. Later in the day, the kids were kind of out of hand, and a colleague who was in my graduating class, the President, the Valedictorian, the friggin' teacher's pet, was telling us that we needed to do a head count, make sure we had all of our kids, organize everyone. I felt like a total degrade reject loser. And he's friggin' handsome on top of everything else. And I don't know what it is, but he's less scrawny than in high school, less cross country man more...I don't know, just more filled out and muscular. Not that I was thinking any of this at the time, I'm just saying how further unfair my position was to this friggin' high school god. Brenden even said thanks for his help, which I refused to do. I think he even looked at me, too, like he expected a thank you from all of us. (Anton followed Brenden's lead). I just wanted the day to end and friggin' leave Noyes Camp. Well, we were boarding the bus at the time which was good, and the ride gave me a chance to cool down. I was really disappointed in the kids' behavior. At least Chatdam won in the Gold Rush game. Because, despite everything, Chatdam rules.